Carl Rogers was one of the most influential people in my life. In a time of turbulence and uncertainty I find it often helpful to review the first chapter in his book “On Becoming a Person.”
It is a short chapter but filled with wisdom.
In a world that often seems focused on getting things done, reaching the goal, and moving on, Carl Rogers believed in the value of the process of living, loving and being human. He said that we naturally tend to move in a good direction if the barriers to right action are cleared away. And one of the biggest barriers, in his view, was the need to pretend.
The last of these quotes is one that you will find referenced elsewhere in this blog, it has been a more or less constant companion in my life.
“In my relationships with people I have found that it does not help, in the long run, to act as though I were something that I am not.”
“I find I am more effective when I can listen to myself, and be myself.”
“I have found it highly rewarding when I can accept another person.”
“The more I am open to the realities in me and in the other person, the less do I find myself rushing in to ‘fix things.'”
“The facts are friendly.”
“What is most personal is most general.”
“It has been my experience that people have a basically positive direction.”
“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”