We have found ourselves wrestling with a couple of situations where patients seem to be trying to help us come to the “right” conclusion about their problems. For example, one young woman is very adamant about the fact that she does not have bipolar disorder. She has a family history of bipolar moods (her mother was bipolar) and the idea …
WorkSurfing
The New York Times recently published an intriguing article entitled “Relax, You Will Be More Effective.” It arrived at just the right time. Preparing for an upcoming vacation had made me particularly hectic. And then, while I was on vacation and writing this post, I got a blog post from MoodScope which was devoted to the importance of taking regular …
To Tell or Not – Part 2
In another post, we talked about the question of whether or not to tell friends and family about the challenges of living with mood disorders and, in particular, whether or not to share a diagnosis (such as bipolar). The discussions there about the many misunderstandings and misconceptions about moods and mood disorders that are commonplace in our society is relevant …
Productivity: Hiding Things You Have to Do
The key to being productive (and managing anxiety) is using tools to keep track of things that you have to do… and, most important, hiding things that you will have to do at some future time but don’t need to do now. We think that one of the reasons we have this state called “anxiety” is because in human history …
Mood and Reality: Mood’s Ability to Shape Perception and Interactions
We have been thinking for a while about how mood powerfully creates our reality. And how hard it is to hold on to a consistent sense of the world as moods change. Mood affects what we notice and remember and how we see it. It also affects where our thoughts naturally tend to go. We ran across an intriguing article …
Reward the Effort
Why is it so hard to make positive changes in our lives? A woman we have been working with came in yesterday and told us about all of the things that she had been doing – making a serious effort to find a satisfying job and career, beginning to get healthy by exercising and joining weight watchers, working on her …
Dynamic Balance
We were talking to a young woman trying to figure out how to maintain more of a balance in her life. She knows that one of the challenges with energized moods is that they can lead to becoming over-committed. On the other hand, one of the great things about that energy is that it often results in getting a lot done. So how do you find …
Negotiation: How to Deal With Conflict
Some of the best ways of dealing with conflicts in relationships, whether business or personal, are contained in the books about negotiation written by Roger Fisher and William Ury. In our own lives and in the lives of people we have counseled we have often seen a situation that seemed to be incredibly scary and full of potential catastrophe turn …
Acceptance: Helpful Readings
Acceptance. We have been influenced by many people in setting up this website. One of those great thinkers is a man whose vision of psychotherapy was founded in acceptance, Carl Rogers. In his book On Becoming a Person he wrote: “The curious paradox is when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” This phrase has resonated …
Getting Where You Want to Go: Remembering Priorities and Problem-Solving
Successful time management is in large measure all about starting with the big things. This is how you go about almost any design and building process. With a kitchen remodel you begin with the major appliances, with a life remodel you build around your life goals. Some people find it helpful to think of the problem of how to fit …
The Practice of Tacking: How to Get Going
Sometimes it is important to get going. We generally think that it is wise to have a clear idea of where you want to go and to head towards that distant goal. However, sometimes we all find ourselves in situations where we have to “tack.” In sailing terms, tacking is how you sail into the wind. If you want to …