Below you'll find a list of all posts that have been categorized as “Self-Esteem”
Who Matters? Do you? Mattering is an important component of well-being Struggling with depression, Isaac slept late every morning, just dashing out in time to be “only a little” late to work each day. His apartment never got cleaned, and meals were a hit-and-miss combination of takeout and supermarket junk food. Then his mom went on vacation and brought her …
Why are we too shy to own our wisdom? I’ve seen teenagers and young adults come out with deep, powerful words from the heart, but at some stage, we learn to say anything like that with a self-deprecating giggle: “don’t take this too seriously-I’m just me”. Anybody who’s been through a few decades of life has gained experience, insight, and …
A discussion with a patient this past week really brought into focus the power of the mind to affect the world. Or maybe it would be better to say how we decide to live in the world. Our patient, I’ll call her “Amy”, is a teacher’s aide in a crowded, underfunded special ed. classroom, and she was saying she is …
What do you do when you make a mistake? Grit your teeth and try again? Or are you afraid to try again? Give yourself a pep talk and reminder to work harder next time? Or do you give yourself the compassionate response you would give a friend who made a similar mistake? Self-compassion is a technique that everyone can use …
A manic or hypomanic episode (mild or severe) can lead a person to taking actions that may be unhealthy, unwise, or even harmful to self or others. This can lead, afterwards, to feelings of guilt and shame. We feel bad about what we have done, but we don’t always know how to move on and make amends. These feelings can …
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) teaches users a technique called “Acceptance Self-Talk”. This is a series of exercises that trains people to substitute new thoughts for old ones and encourages them to evaluate their thoughts and accept only what seems true and helpful. Depression is often characterized by recurrent negative thoughts that drag one down and become barriers to taking …
The mind is naturally drawn to threats and often acts as though the world is filled with powerful dangers, this bias towards threat-seeking makes the practice of noticing your power essential. Without conscious effort we run the risk of acting in ways that are self-destructive. This is the powerful insight of psychologist Jim McCullough about people who have experienced repeated …
Addressing Shame and Guilt After a Manic Episode I have witnessed the immense pain caused by the shame and guilt experienced by people with bipolar disorder following a manic episode. After a manic episode, most have engaged in behaviors that they regret. The resulting shame and guilt can contribute greatly to symptoms of depression that follow an episode. Understanding techniques …
Believing you can create change in your life is the foundation for successfully making the change. Self efficacy is the sense that you can make change and thus hope and self-efficacy are intimately connected. Often people with bipolar or depression are overwhelmed with feelings of hopelessness. They feel stuck and unable to manage their moods. And yet a great deal of research shows …
A longtime reader of this blog sent us an email – “I wanted to share one of my favorite blogs. I first found out about the author and blog through his amazing article right after Robin Williams’ suicide. I feel he writes what I feel but can’t put into words on my mental health. Best, Geraldine.” http://letsqueerthingsup.com/2015/06/22/mental-health-recovery-isnt-always-daisies-puppies-and-rainbows-and-thats-ok/ Geraldine has bipolar …
…The Becks Questionnaire II business continues. What brings it alive are the questions that Dr. Black continues to ask me throughout the test until we arrive at, what for me, is an astonishing discovery… At some point Dr. Black tells me there is a store on Martha s Vineyard, a ritzy, gentrified island off of Cape Cod, Massachusetts, that has …
Robin William’s death seemed to unleash a new level of openness to discussing depression and the ways that it affects the lives of so many of us. A Nature editorial (Nature is perhaps the premier scientific journal in the world) got me thinking about next steps… What would it take to eliminate the impact of stigma, and shame, and therefore …
Wise Selflessness– The Dalai lama says, “It is important that when pursuing our own self-interest we should be “wise selfish” and not “foolish selfish”. Being foolish selfish means pursuing our own interests in a narrow, shortsighted way. Wise selfishness means taking a broader view and recognizing that our own long-term individual interest lies in the welfare of everyone. Being wise selfish means …
Much has been written about the topic of “self-esteem.” Sometimes the idea almost seems like one of those “buzz” words that doesn’t really mean anything. A significant amount of research points to the development of self-esteem as a key aspect of mental health. Self-esteem builds slowly and its foundation is the sense that we are loved and valued by others. …
The other day I was asked to evaluate a fellow physician by his disability insurance company. When I do disability assessments I take particular care, because what I say has big implications for the person I am evaluating, and I try very hard to do an extremely careful and thorough job of assessing the person’s situation. Three quarters of the …
Sometimes it is simple ideas that resonate the most powerfully with our psyches. This week I have found myself, again and again, thinking about the fairly simple but quite elegantly described ideas in the book Hard Wiring Happiness. I should probably admit that I’ve only gotten about half way through the book, but even so, it has had quite an …
Proactive behavior refers to actions taken that are forward thinking, that anticipate future problems, and are aimed at avoiding those problems. They are focused on changing the environment for the better. Proactivity contrasts with reactivity as an approach to challenges. Reactive behavior is about dealing with the crisis that is present right now. Reactivity also often is associated with a wish …
Today’s post revolves around a universal wish for others to be perfectly attuned to our needs, and the resulting disappointment when this is not the case. A woman we have seen for years, who has been experiencing a strong sense of disappointment and loss because her highly anxious mother was never able to really attune to her needs, told us …
It can be extremely difficult to lead a balanced lifestyle. When we are driven to reach a goal, it is easy to become stressed and obsessed with reaching a particular outcome. At what point does all the stress start to have a negative impact on our personal happiness? It is great to have ambitions and to work hard to reach …
The difference between someone who has confidence versus someone who does not, is remarkable. Confidence has the power to completely transform a person’s life. The question is, if you don’t have it already, how do you get it? Listed below are some strategies to help you believe in yourself, increase your self worth, and realize that you are worthy of …
